Chapter Eight: False Hope

I arrived at her apartment, nerves making my limbs wobbly. Over two times, I almost dropped our food heading into the building. Just getting to her apartment complex wasn’t easy. To get the food, I had to dodge paps and anyone else who stared for too long. I felt like a spy, even though I really wasn’t. Then there was navigating through the insanely busy streets of LA while trying to listen and follow the direction of my GPS. I was lucky I didn’t crash my car, although there was several times where I thought I just might do that. On top of it all, I was nervous about talking to Dani. I was going to have to be honest, which normally wasn’t a big deal but when your hearts on the line, I tend to keep mine private and safe. There was so much to catch up on since I’d last seen her: Niall had been in two relationships, with fans no less. Louis and Eleanor had tied the knot and Zayn had moved through three girlfriends. The only ones who hadn’t changed were Danielle and Liam, and then there was me. Well that wasn’t quite true; I had changed in a way. I was more mature; I understood myself better and what I wanted and what I didn’t want. I’d felt the tentacles of fame strangling me just after everything with Dani had occurred; I’d been forced into a relationship for publicity reasons. She was a really sweet girl, who worked hard to be where she was but there wasn’t a spark and I had felt trapped. I’d been overjoyed when it had ended, even though, through it all she’d become a good friend. I then reached apartment 2 only to realize it was 2A, she hadn’t given me the letter. I whipped out my phone and dialed her number. “Hello,” came her sing song voice.

“Hey, um… which apartment 2 are you in?” I asked teasingly.

“Oh, I forgot the letter,” she giggled. Chills ran up my spine and I felt melancholic at the sound of her laughter. “It’s 2H, so I am up on floor eight.”

“Okay, see you soon,” I chuckled.

“Yeah, see you soon, Harry,” she echoed and then hung up. I searched for the elevator then and once I found it, I pressed the ascend button. I waited not so patiently for it to arrive. My stomach was grumbling in hunger and nerves. The elevator beeped and I entered. Riding it up, I only became more anxious. So much so, that the palms of my hands had become clammy. The elevator reached the floor and dinged. I walked out and when I reached apartment 2H, I knocked. I could hear music playing on the other side of the door. The music was then turned down and I could hear the locks of the door clicking. My anticipation grew as the door swung inward and I saw… My face fell; a guy had answered the door. For a second I was worried he I had gotten the wrong room.

He gave me a puzzled look, before he called over his shoulder, “Dani, there’s someone at the door.” I knew I wasn’t mistaken then, it was the apartment Dani had told me.

She appeared around the corner and her eyes lit up exactly the way they did all those years ago. “Harry! You made it!” she exclaimed gleefully.

“Yeah,” I replied uncertainly. “I didn’t know I needed to get food for three.”

She giggled, “You didn’t. Dale was on his way out, weren’t you love?”

He nodded and put his hand out of me to shake. He was a burley guy with beefy arms and short cropped brown hair. His eyes were hazel but they seemed to hold a lot of contempt in them and immediately I felt intimidated. “Dani has told me a lot about you, Harry. It’s nice to finally meet you,” he said with a smirk on his face.

“I’m sorry that I can’t say the same. Well, Dani hasn’t mentioned you, is what I mean,” I stumbled.

He laughed and I jumped in surprise from how loud it was. Dani smiled and said, “Come on in, Harry.” I began my way in but froze when Dale gave Dani a quick kiss and wiggled his way out the door. “He has to go to work,” she said and I realized I’d been staring at Dale’s departing figure. I swallowed the lump in my throat and I could feel the back of my eyes burning. There I was thinking she’d be mind for the taking and I came to find her heart belonged to another. I was too late again. I felt like someone had jabbed a knife up my rib cage and torn my heart from my chest. I followed her into her apartment. We sat down across from each other to eat. I felt like shutting down and blowing her off by giving some lame excuse. The idea was extremely compelling and I almost gave in, but I didn’t.

I had made a promise to myself that I would do whatever it took to have Dani as my own. Dale was simply a setback that was all. I would just have to work harder and be a bit cleverer in my advances. I smiled at Dani charmingly, “Is dinner to your liking?”

She nodded, “It’s my absolute favorite.”

“I know, you told me,” I chuckled.

“Oh right,” she giggled. After that she became quiet for several minutes. “Harry,” she finally said.

“Hm...” I replied raising my eyebrows.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Dale,” she said quietly. Her crossed legs were bouncing as she played with her food. In her other hand she was rubbing her ear lobe, her brow was furrowed and she was chewing on her bottom lip. Immediately, I knew she was feeling stressed and worried.

“Dani,” I said, making her look up at me, “Stop stressing and worrying about it because I know now. How long have you two been together?’ I smiled and she relaxed. It was weird how tense she got when she hadn’t told me about her relationship with Dale. We hadn’t had the best of conversations the times we had actually seen each other.

“Four months, actually,” she replied and then she took a bite.

“Only four months and you’re already living together?” I asked, raising my eyebrows in surprise.

She shrugged, “Dale wanted to.”

I saw my opening in the shrug of her shoulders. “Didn’t you want to?” She shrugged again. “Why did you if you didn’t want to?”

“Because it’s within walking distance of my work and the college, plus it sounded like a good idea at the time,” she shrugged again.

“That doesn’t sound like a good enough reason to move in with someone. You’re missing a very important detail,” I commented with a smirk on my face.

She stared me down. “Okay then, what is a good reason and what am I missing?”

I leaned back and crossed my arms to make it appear like I was thinking. I sat up straight suddenly and her gaze shot to mine. “Love, Dani. The only reason I would ever have my girlfriend move in with me would be if we truly, deeply loved each other and were planning on spending the rest of our lives together. Only then would I consider living together.” For a long time, she just stared at me with this look of wonder on her face. Finally, I asked, “What?”

“You’ve changed, Mr. Styles,” she replied coyly.

I stared deeply into her eyes, trying to make her feel how I felt for her when I said, “You’d be surprised how much some of me hasn’t changed, Miss Sams.”

He cheeks flushed and I knew she’d received my message. She played with her food and I knew she was contemplating, so I left her and her thoughts in peace. I would win her back; I knew she still had feeling for me because neither of us had received any closure. After several minutes of silence, we had completed our meal and I began to clean up. I was throwing away the containers in the rubbish, when Dani came up behind me. I turned and started a bit at her close proximity. “Harry,” she began. “I don’t know if I should do this but…” She took a step closer and as I looked into her eyes I knew what was coming. I, as well, didn’t know if it was a good idea but you could still feel the static in the air when we were alone. Our chemical attraction was unmistakable, it was thrilling and passionate.  A single touch from her sent my body into a flurry of nerves and gooseflesh. As she placed her hand on my arm and reached up to the tip of her toes, my body reacted. I moved in closer, placed my hands on her waist and pulled her up against me. Our breaths mingled together in the heated empty space between our lips. For several seconds, we both wondered if we should really do this. I wouldn’t be hurting anyone but she was with Dale and I didn’t want to cause any problems for her. I don’t know how long we stood like that before Dani whispered, “Screw it,” and she pressed her lips against mine.

For the second time in my life, I felt like I was complete and I’d found where I’d belonged. And it was right here with Dani with her by my side I could accomplish anything and conquer everything. There was not a doubt in my mind that we were made for each other. Dale or no Dale, she was mine.

Chapter Seven: Impatience

I tossed and turned the night after. The look in her eyes haunting my thoughts. I couldn’t figure out why she had reacted the way she did. If she no longer felt the way she had said in that first email, how come she ran out the she had. She even remembered my quirks. How could someone remember those things if they still didn’t feel something for that person. I, myself, could still remember when she was stressed out she would bounce her legs and chew on the inside of her bottom lip. When she was concerned her brow would furrow and she’d rub her right earlobe with her thumb and forefinger. I could still remember the way her eyes lit up every time she saw me or the way her voice sounded on the phone and I would immediately recognize the smile in her voice; the way her melodic rang in my ears and echoed throughout a room. It didn’t matter how much time had passed, I still remember her as if three years ago had happened yesterday. I knew she was still in love with her, as much now as then. The hair on my arms and the back of my neck would stand on end, just when I would think about her. As I started to feel my eyes droop that night, my alarm blared. It was time to get up already and go to rehearsals. Crap! I haven’t received a wink of sleep. I was definitely going to be a space cadet today, I thought.

I quickly got dressed and raced down to where we all got in the car and headed to the arena to rehearse. On the way we grabbed some McDonald’s and ate in the car. When we arrived, we were rushed in and got all set up and plugged in so we could properly rehearse. Niall was joking and laughing around with Josh and the other band members, while I was getting hooked up with my in ears.  We got in position and then my mind just wandered. I couldn’t stop thinking about Dani and all the things I probably missed out on with her and if she still even loved me. I couldn’t get her out of my mind and it was trying to figure out how to get her back, but I just didn’t know how.

Someone slugged me in the arm and I jumped coming out of my thoughts. I’d been in the midst of remembering what I’d been thinking about last night and with that slug in the arm, I finally came to a conclusion. She was still in love with me! My heart soared and my stomach leapt. I felt like jumping in the air and running around in circles while singing the sappiest love songs to the boys. There was nothing that could stop me now. I knew she loved me that was the only answer, nothing else fit. Suddenly, I was hit in the arm again and Louis said, “Oi! Harry! Earth to Harry! C’mon man, we’re trying to rehearse for the concert and you keep missing all your ques!”

“Sorry,” I mumbled. We’d been rehearsing all morning and we were about to take a break for lunch. I couldn’t believe how fast the time had passed and how I hadn’t been here mentally all morning long. I couldn’t even quite remember getting here. I’d been so absorbed with my thoughts of Dani that I’d completely tuned out everyone else.

“Are you alright, mate?” Niall asked concerned as he stood by me. I nodded and then he added, “I ask because you just don’t seem all here today.”

“Yeah, I am stuck in my head,” I agreed. He went to say something else but the music started and I made sure I focused on what I was supposed to do this time. An hour or two later, a bunch of pizza boxes were delivered and as they came in the doors we could hear the fans outside.

When it reached us, Niall exclaimed, “Awesome!!! I’m absolutely starving!” Before eating, I went to Paul and got Dani’s number from him. As I was walking away, I finally thought it odd that he would have Dani’s number. I decided to ask him later because right then I was just as hungry as everyone else. Also, if I wanted some pizza, I needed to get it now. I could see from where I was that Niall was going to eat until he was bursting.

After we finished eating, we did a couple more hours of rehearsal and then we had the rest of the day off. In the car heading back to the hotel, I sent a text to Dani. It simply read: “Hey, it’s Harry. Paul gave me your number. Idk how he got it but he does… To keep this short… We need to talk. I am free for the rest of the day. Plz get back to me. X J”  I hovered over the send button, taking in a deep breath I tapped on it.

Shortly after, we arrived at the hotel. We entered through the back door. All the boys wanted to spend some time swimming then. I’d agreed, knowing that going for a swim would be loads of fun. We snuck our way to the elevators and headed up. We were walking down the hall when Paul said, “Get ready to go to the pool but wait until we have cleared it out before you come down. You’ll know when.” We all nodded, showing we understood. It was normal procedure and after five years, we were all used to it.

We all separated to go into our separate suites. I entered mine with a sigh then tried to search through my mess of a bag for my swimming trunks. Once I found them, I quickly changed into them, grabbed a towel, threw on a tank top and headed out to the living room. I put my work phone on the hutch and my iPod while I kept my personal phone on my person. I was hoping Dani would reply soon and I wanted to keep it close just in case she did. My work phone buzzed and I checked it to see an “all clear” from Paul.

As I exited, I met up with the boys and we made our way, along with our security guys to the pool. We had to pass by a bunch of fans. They were all screaming or hollering for us to sign something or take a picture with them. I was feeling gracious, so I signed a few things and took several pictures. All the other guys were doing the same. You could tell a lot of the fans were freaking out because we were all in our swim wear. I found that amusing. We tore ourselves away and waved goodbye as we entered the pool area.

As I placed my towel on a lounge chair and proceeded to take off my tank top, my phone buzzed. My heart began to pound as I brought it up so I could see who it was from. I felt disappointed that it wasn’t from Dani but happy to hear from my sister, Gemma. Since I knew she didn’t expect a reply from me for a while, I placed my phone on my towel and proceeded to go to the pool. I tossed my tank top on the chair as well and turned to get in the pool. Niall and Louis were already rough housing and the pool area echoed with their laughter.

Once in the pool, I joined in on the messing around. Before we knew it, all of our stomachs were growling with hunger pains. Only when it became unbearable did we decide to get out and get something to eat. Drying off my torso and hair, I heard Niall laughing over the fact that Liam had slipped and fell back in the pool. The rest of us were chuckling and I put my tank top back on after I’d wrapped my towel around my waist.

I picked up my phone and began to check it. There were two new messages, one from my mum and another from Gemma. I felt my heart sink just a bit more when there wasn’t anything from Dani. I replied back to both my mum and Gemma as we left the pool. Niall and Louis were trying to decide what we should eat. Niall usually had to think of all his options when we were in LA because there wasn’t a Nandos in America.

When we reached our floor, I excused myself from their decision making to go shower. While in the shower, I felt anxious. Why wasn’t she answering my text? Was she ignoring me like I did to her for all those years? I really needed to speak with her before I headed back to London. I finished my shower and quickly got dressed. I felt jittery like I needed to constantly keep myself occupied. I headed to Niall’s room, which was where we had decided on meeting to eat.

On my way there, my personal phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and when I read who it was from, my heart constricted and my stomach flipped. I stopped walking and opened the message from Dani. It read: “You’re right. We do need to talk. I’m free in about thirty minutes. Do you want to meet somewhere or you come here or I there?”

I looked up to see Paul heading my way, “Hey Paul,” I said. He acknowledged me by looking at me and I continued, “Is there any way I can go out tonight?”

Paul nodded, “Yes, just as long as Andy goes with you.”

“Oh… uh… well I was hoping to go lone wolf because I am going to be seeing Dani,” I said.

His eyebrows rose in understanding. “I see… Well it’s just we don’t want you to get mauled by fans or the paps.”

“What if I were to pick up some take out and go to her place?” I countered.

Paul nodded and smiled, “Yes that should work. Should I have your car pulled up?”

I nodded and thanked him. For a split second I thought it strange to have one of my cars here but then again it was known that I would want to use one. Normally when we were in America, I liked to go off on my own. I continued on to Niall’s room to let the boys know I wouldn’t be joining them for dinner. On my way there I sent a reply to Dani. It said: “How about we do it at your place? That way we won’t be bothered. How do you feel about Chinese?”

As I entered Niall’s room, my phone buzzed with her answer. “Alright, I live in Apartment 2 of the Glendhill complex. You can GPS it ;) also make sure you get take out from Pei Wei (it’s Thai but it works) and I love the Kung Pao chicken with broccoli ;)” I laughed at how specific she had to be. I was more than happy to oblige her though.

“What are you chuckling, Haz?” Louis asked.

“Dani,” I simply answered. The all gave me curious looks and I added, “Oh also, I won’t be eating with you guys tonight. I am going over to her place. We need to have a chat. She was telling me what she wanted and from where for dinner.”

Louis raised his eyebrows up and down teasing me. I ignored him and replied to Dani’s text. I said: “Alright lol, so I’ll show up around 6 then?” I looked back up at Louis and the other who were mocking what I’d just been doing. “Ha ha, very funny,” I said with sarcasm.

“So, I have a question,” Zayn said. I nodded and he continued, “Do you still have like feelings for her?”

I paused to seem like I was thinking even though every fiber of my being was screaming, YES! “Yes, I believe I am still very much in love with her,” I replied. The boys then wolf whistled and teased me to no end. I just shook my head and said, “I have to get going. She’s waiting for me.” They teased even more, I just shook my head and walked out the door. I was on my way to Dani. I’d promised myself years ago that if I ever found her, there was no way I was ever going to let her go again. That was a promise I intended to keep and bring to pass somehow that day. 

Chapter Six: A Surprise Visitor

I swear I just stood staring at her flabbergasted for several minutes before she chuckled uncomfortably and said, “Uh, can I come in?”

I took a step back and she walked in, wringing her hands together. Shaking my head and blinking rapidly to bring myself back to earth, I gently closed the door. As I turned around to head back into the main part of my suite, I texted Paul saying, “Never mind”. Shuffling, I made my way over to where she was standing but kept my distance and kept quiet. I didn’t know what to say to her. I had expected a text or maybe even a phone call but not an unexpected visit to my hotel room. How did she even know where I was staying and which room it was? “How…” I began.

“How did I figure out where you were staying?” She interrupted. I nodded stupidly, still in shock that she was even here. “Come on, Harry! As if the thousands of girls outside isn’t an obvious sign and to be honest all I had to do was ask an update account on Twitter. They gave it to me immediately,” she said sounding a bit amused with herself.

“Oh,” I replied. I furrowed my brow and went to sit in one of the single cushion chairs so she wouldn’t be able to sit close to me. I ran a hand through my hair and then fixed it afterwards.

She sat down in the chair next to me and asked, “Are you alright? You only ever run your hand through your hair and then fix it when you’re upset about something.” I gazed at her in bewilderment. How could she possibly still remember? We hadn’t seen each other in over three years. She averted her eyes and I watched as her cheeks flushed. She cleared her throat and said quietly, “Just because I haven’t seen you in quite some time, Harry doesn’t mean I don’t remember you and your quirks.” Once again, I couldn’t find anything to say back. I was never at a loss for words… Okay I take that back, sometimes I am. We sat quietly and finally, she groaned and stood up quickly. She stood over me with her hands on her hips and glared down at me. “Will you please say something?! I am dying over here!”

I felt anger swell in my chest but I held it at bay and stood up so I towered over her. I was a good fifteen and a half centimeters taller than her. She craned her neck back slightly to keep our gaze locked. “What do you want me to say, Dani? You show up here unexpected and expect me to act as if no time has passed as if there isn’t any residual hurt left behind. I can’t do that, I still am trying to wrap my mind around the idea that you’re even here. So yeah, I am finding it difficult to find words to say something.”

She took a step back, shocked. Her eyes began to shine as tears built up in her tear ducts. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think you would still even care.”

“Of course I care, Dani. You know me!” I said, trying to keep my voice from rising in volume. 

She shook her head and looked back up at me, a glint in her eye. “How was I supposed to know you still cared, Harry? For over a year, I emailed you almost every month and not once did you ever reply! What was I supposed to think?”

I sighed, “I know. I don’t blame you. I was a complete git.”

“You’re right you were but I also understand that you were hurt because I was as well,” she replied quietly as she shuffled her feet and stared at the ground.

I started to reach out for her but thought better of it and retracted my hand, “I know before you got here, I had just finished reading through all of the emails I ignored of yours over the years.”

She jumped and stared at a look of slight horror on her face. “You did?!” I nodded and she continued, “I didn’t think you kept them…”

“I did. I think we need to talk, Dani,” I said.

She was shaking her head determinedly now and backing up to the door. “I can’t… I can’t do this right now.” Once the words left her mouth, she turned and ran out of the room. Without a moment of hesitation, I was chasing after her.

There were a few security guys outside in the hallway and when Dani ran passed them obviously upset and then I came quickly after, they tried to stop me. I believe I shoved several of them away and said, “Dani! Wait!” She didn’t take the elevator, she threw the stair door open and began her descent with me on her heels. We got to the first floor and she burst through the door before me and as I went out, someone grabbed me. I turned on him to see Paul. “Paul, let me go! I have to go after her!” I said in hysterics. I couldn’t let her get away again! I wouldn’t allow it!

“Harry, there is paparazzi out there. You can’t be seen chasing after a girl they haven’t ever seen before,” he reasoned.

I squirmed in his grip. “But I have to, Paul. It was Dani.”

“I know it was. I gave her permission to go up. You have her email and I have her cell number. You can reach her that way, Harry,” he reasoned once again.

I calmed down a plan formulating in my mind. “Okay, will you let me go now?” Paul nodded and as soon as he let me go, I raced outside. I looked from left to right trying to find Dani, but she was long gone. “No, this can’t be happening,” I groaned. I placed both of my hands on top of my head and looked around with a distraught expression on my face. People were flashing their cameras and I groaned. I turned back around and went back into the hotel. I could hear fans screaming at me but I just looked in their direction, smiled, and waved as I continued on my way. I got to the elevators and pressed the up button. I stood their feeling completely distraught. The doors opened to an elevator on my right and I entered. Once in, I groaned once again and said, “I can’t believe I lost her again! Ugh! Why?!” I pounded my fist on the wall next to me and then just took a deep calming breath.

My mind was running a million miles and minute. I was trying to figure out what to do and then it finally hit me: I found her once, I’d find her again! There was no way I was going to let her get away! I loved her too much! The elevator doors opened on my floor and I strutted to my suite with a new found conviction. I was going to find her and I was going to fix this. I didn’t care how long it took me; I loved her too much to just let her get away again!

Chapter Five: Regret and Guilt

That night I was sitting alone in my hotel room. I could hear the boys in their suites next door laughing and enjoying themselves. For some reason I couldn’t get myself to join them. I had a continual thought running through my mind of Dani saying, “I emailed you for your number but you never replied.” I know I hadn’t replied; I never did after that night three years ago.

Now here I was sitting on the couch, staring at my laptop. I had opened the folder where I’d saved all of the emails she’d sent me and yet none of them had been read.  I just stared at them wondering if I should read them or not. I didn’t want to dig up all the old pain I buried because I’d buried it for the purpose of staying that way. I wondered what she had said in any of these; there were about twenty-five emails. Yes, there were that many of them unread. I wondered if one of the emails contains what she felt was so important that she needed to speak to me about it, in person.

I think I was sitting there for over an hour, debating whether or not to actually read the emails, when I finally opened the first unread email. It was dated three days after that night. It wasn’t very long. I could almost imagine her writing and rewriting it, trying to find the right wording for what she wanted to say. I remembered during that time she’d been trying to reach me but I would ignore her calls and texts. The email read:

From: Dani Sams

To: Harry Styles

 I really wish you would stop ignoring me, Harry. I don’t want to have to say what I want to say via an email. Although since you don’t seem to want to give a choice in that, I suppose I will have to do it this way.

I’m sorry, Harry! I don’t think when we met each other we would end up breaking each other’s hearts. I wish I had met you first before Max because then maybe we wouldn’t be in this mess. I love you, Harry! I really do! Unfortunately, Max found me first and we waited too long after we met to share our feelings for each other. I don’t know if you will even answer this or read it. In fact, I’m pretty sure you will ignore this email. But I wanted to somehow know that I did everything I could to tell you… I’m in love with you, Mr. Styles, madly, passionately, inconsolably in love with you. I would leave Max in a heartbeat right now if you asked me to! I realized today that I don’t feel the same way for him as I do for you… Please read this before it’s too late… I miss my best friend…

Love,

Danibear <3

I couldn’t breathe. She was in love with me or had been when she wrote the email. Oh how I wished I’d not ignored that email! I could’ve been with her all this time if I had only read and replied. “Idiot!” I hissed angrily to myself. I clicked to read the next email which was dated a week after the other one.

From: Dani Sams

To: Harry Styles

I’m guessing since I haven’t heard from you, you’ve either ignored my last email or you really don’t care about me in that way. I am honestly hoping the latter is not the case.

The only reason I’m emailing you again (which you will probably ignore anyway) is to let you know what happened last night. I broke up with Max. I just felt him moving to LA with me was a mistake, especially when I didn’t have any feelings for him anymore. I can’t stop thinking about. I feel awful about what happened between us.

Please answer me! I don’t know what else to say and you won’t answer my calls or texts.

Love,

Danibear <3

I read through so many of the emails and by the end, she was saying how done she was hoping I would reply to her. Also she said at the end, “This is my final goodbye. I won’t email you anymore. I won’t bother you; I won’t even try and get ahold of you on twitter. I hope you’re happy Harry. I really do. I love you and wish you all the happiness in the world. Goodbye, Love, Danibear.”

Tears were now clouding my vision. I was literally pounding my fist on my thigh because of my stupidity. I had been so worried about my own pain and reading her say over and over again that we had no chance of it working out between us…  I’d completely missed my second chance at happiness with Dani. I couldn’t take any more of these heart wrenching emails. There was one thing I knew for sure; I was an absolute moron!

I stood up quickly while shutting my laptop in anger and tossed it onto the couch beside me. I paced the room, running my fingers through my hair. I was furious with myself and my stupidity. I needed to get out of my room and just take a walk in the cool night air. I quickly texted Paul that I was going out and as I was putting on a light jumper, a knock echoed through my room. I was expecting to see one of the security guys, specifically Andy, he always seemed to go everywhere with me. I hurried over to the door to open it and when I did I saw someone I wasn’t expecting to see.

“Hello Harry.”

My mind and body froze. I couldn’t think of what to say and when I did finally get something out, it was a pained voice which whispered as I released a held breath of air, “Dani.”

Chapter 4: Three Years Come and Gone

I sat in my hotel room, three years later with Niall and Louis just chilling in LA before we were meant to go to rehearsals. I'd spaced off again, remember Dani and knowing she was going to school near here. I sighed out loud and Louis said, "It's happening again."

"What?" I asked innocently.

"You're thinking about her again, aren't you?" He asked. I shook my head. "Yes you are, Harry. Every time we come to LA you get that far away look in your eyes and we all know you're thinking about Dani."

I flinched at the sound of her name; I hadn't been able to say it since that night but she was always in the back of my mind. I couldn't do anything without some random memory of her popping up in my head and making me melancholic. It had been three years and I still hadn't moved on. Everything just seemed to stop; even the fans knew there was something wrong with me. I kept hearing how much they missed the old me and how much I'd changed. I didn't know what to tell them because I hadn't told anyone but the boys about Dani. "Harry," Niall joked. "Come back to us." I focused on both of their concerned faces and then it seemed like a light bulb turned on in Niall's head. "Hey, we don't have to do any rehearsals today, so why don't we go to Disneyland and maybe get Harry's mind off of, you know who."

"Brilliant," Louis exclaimed as he jumped up. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me up in the next beat, "C'mon, Harry. We're gonna go be kids today and forget about the worries of an adult."

I couldn't help but laugh at my friends and soon enough we had all the boys together and were on our way to Disneyland. The paparazzi had a load of funny pictures by the time we were almost done. We were heading towards Splash Mountain, when I saw Dani ahead of me. I froze mid-stride and just stared, my heart pounding and aching all at once. Liam paused, "What is it Harry?" He followed my gaze and then sucked in his breath when he saw her.

"We can go somewhere else," Louis interjected.

I shook my head, "No it's okay. I need to move on and maybe this will help me do that." We continued on our way forward to the line and I instantly knew we would be standing right behind her in the line for Splash Mountain. In a small way I was excited to see her again but then as I remembered what happened the last time we’d seen each other, I was filled with anxiety. There were many times I would sit and stare at my emails, trying to build up the courage to email her back or I would try and send her a dm on Twitter. I felt my insides torn every time I wouldn’t follow through with it. Now here she was right in front of me and I couldn’t get out a word. I was a failure. Here I was Mr. Harry Styles, the member of the band that every girl wanted to get with, the guy that paparazzi made out to be a womanizer, and yet I couldn’t even talk to the woman I loved because I’d messed up.

We finally reached the back of the line. I wasn’t chatting with the other boys, I was just staring... staring at the back of Dani’s blonde head. Louis patted me on the back and said, “So, how are you enjoying yourself, Harry?”

He said the question loud enough that I knew Dani would for sure hear him. “I’m having loads of fun! I’m glad we had today off to just chill and have fun,” I replied forcing some exuberance into my voice. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Dani turn around with a look of utter shock mixed with fear on her face. I don’t know why I would see fear there, but there it was.

She furrowed her brow and asked uncertainly, “Harry?”

I allowed myself to finally look in her direction and as I did, I noticed the boys become very quiet. “Dani?” I said pretending to be surprised. She smiled slowly and then threw her arms around me in a giant hug and I tried not to stiffen when I began to hear camera’s going off. I enjoyed the moment though. Closing my eyes I took in her scent and was surprised to find she smelled the same. Her hair was longer and curlier but still just as soft. As my arms were wrapped around her waist, my hands touched the sides of her hips and I felt myself wishing we had met somewhere private. This was going to be a painful reunion. I had no idea if she was still with Max or what had transpired there. All I knew was that my heart still ached for her after all these years.

She pulled away all of a sudden and I was left being drawn out of my thoughts sharply. “Why didn’t you ever email me back Harry? I’ve missed you, we have so much to catch up on,” she replied with a smile.

I blinked trying to gathering my bearings and say something back. Finally I let them spill out. “Do you still have my number or something? We are here for rehearsals and some promos while we are here. I am only here for a couple of weeks. We get a week off before we start up again and I decided to stay in LA for most of that week,” I said as quickly and as quietly as I could so that paparazzi wouldn’t hear me.

She smiled and said, “No I actually don’t have your number anymore. I dropped my phone in some water a couple years ago and lost quite a bit of numbers, plus you never answered my email asking for your number.”

I blushed in embarrassment. I’d purposely ignored all of her emails. They all sat unopened and unread. “Here give me your phone,” I said. Immediately the boys crowded around so the paparazzi couldn’t see what I was doing. Dani handed me her phone and I quickly inserted my number. “Text me later today and we can see when we can have a chat to catch up.” When I looked back up at her, the expression on her face told me she wanted me to say something more. I swallowed, “I’ve missed you too, Dani, probably more than you think.” Her eyes widened with surprise but before she could say anything she and her friends were next in line for the ride. She waved goodbye, her brows furrowed with not being able to say what she had been thinking. Once she was out of sight, I took a deep breath and sighed. Liam patted my shoulder but didn’t say anything. He knew that I knew what he meant.

The rest of the day spent in the park flew by in a blur. I couldn’t stop thinking about Dani. What was so important to her that we needed to catch up? My chest tightened just at the thought of spending alone time with her. After all these years, she still had that effect on me… I knew I was in even more trouble now of falling in love with her than I was three years ago.

Chapter Three: Confession and Heartache :'(

Several minutes had passed and we sat in an awkward silence, you could cut the tension with a knife. It was that thick! Finally, I got the courage to sit up and grab the picnic basket and turn towards Dani. "Are you hungry?" I asked.

She nodded, "Famished." I opened the basket and began to display its contents. I had worked hard on this meal, using my best chef skills to make it. I dished some of the food for her and handed her the plate. She smiled in thank sand then I poured her a drink. I opted out of an alcoholic beverage because I wanted to be clear minded and I had to be able to drive. So, would she eventually. We ate in companionable silence as the sun continued on its path across the sky.

We made casual conversation for the rest of the meal. The more time I spent around her, the stronger my feelings became. That night I felt as if my heart would burst from my chest with the agony of waiting. There were times I thought I glimpsed that she might have stronger feelings for me but held herself back. It was so frustrating! Whenever I wanted to just tell her how I felt lyrics from one of Ed's songs would get stuck in my head. They said, "Mustn't get our feet we, 'cause that leads to regret, diving in too soon". Automatically, I would hesitate and decide to just enjoy her friendship for now. It took all my self-control to not tell her or give a hint. Even thought this romantic date I had brought her on was kind of a big hint. I didn't realize I was brooding until Dani leaned forward to look me in the eyes and asked, "What's bothering you so much that you've gone so far away, Harry?"

My eyes connected with hers and she smiled sweetly which I returned. "It's nothing, really," I replied, brushing off her concern.

Her brow furrowed in unbelief. "I may not have known you for very long but I can always tell when something is bothering you. Now spill the beans or I will force it out of you."

My chest tightened in panic. I wasn't ready to tell her my feelings. I searched for a partial truth of something that was believable to be bothering me. I scrambled desperately through my brain trying to find something, anything! Then it hit me, Larry Stylinson. It came up every so often and to be honest it did hurt. There was a strain on my friendship with Louis because of it. I hardly ever spent time with him anymore. We used to be inseparable once but now out of fear and respect for Eleanor, I backed off. It hurt to lose one of my best mates because of a joke that went too far. I told Dani all about it then and she bought it. It was true, still is sometimes but in that moment I had barely escaped telling her how I felt about her. To be honest, I felt relief but I would come to regret not telling her in that moment for years to come.


A month later, I slammed my apartment door shut behind me. The walls vibrated from the impact and I felt like screaming or punching something! I was such an idiot! Telling everyone that she was just my friend and lying about having further intentions. I'd probably lost her for forever now! I grabbed something off a table in my living room and chucked it. Hearing the crash sent me reeling. I ran my fingers roughly through my hair tugging at my strands of hair. Of all the people for her to be with, I hardly thought it would be my mate from my hometown! My heart ached and I crumbled into a fetal position, fighting back the tears that threatened to surface. I dragged my hands through my hair again and then covered my face as the tears rolled down my cheeks freely now. I begged for the aching to stop but it relentlessly trudged on, tearing every little bit of my heart and soul into shreds. I punched the ground next to me only toh it something adnt hen Ed Sheeran's album played loudly enough that I could hear the lyrics. They penetrated my mind with poignance and my sorrow only deepened. I could hear my phone ringing but I ignored it by tossing it across the room. I didn't care if it broke, I could easily replace it.

Several minutes later I laid on my back on the floor. Tears still coming and my breathing still ragged. I heard someone knock on my door but ignored it. It continued, the knocking turning eventually into pounding. "Harry!" Someone exclaimed. "Harry open the door! I know you're in there! I can hear your music!" By then I knew it was Dani and my heart lept and I frowned deeper. Her pounding continued for a few more minutes and then dissipated. I raised my head wondering why she had given up so quickly.

Slowly I got to a sitting position and then forced myself to stand. I wiped my tears from my face and looked through the peep hole in my door. I didn't see her and leaned my back against the door sighing then resting my head against the door. I then heard approaching footsteps in the hall and realized she had gon to get the spark key I'd accidently left in her car. She was going to get in and I wouldn't be able to stop her. Immediately, I went to hide behind my counter in the kitchen. I heard her struggling with the lock and I took a deep breath. The door creaked open and she called for me. I held my breath, having no intention of answering her. "Harry Edward Styles! I know you're in here! Come sit by me on the couch and we can talk," she said. I heard her settle on the couch and my stomach clenched.

"What if I don't want to talk, Dani?! Did you ever think I might not want to talk or even see you again?" My tone came out harsher than I planned but my heart was still hurting and she didn't understand. I didn't know if I could tell her now after what I had just discovered earlier today.

"Harry, you're my friend. I deserve an explanation," she said calmly. I groaned as I stood up and shuffled my way over to her. I plopped down as far away from her as I could on the couch. Her eyes widened and her brow furrowed when she saw my swollen red eyes and the tracks my tears had left on my flushed face. She scooted closer to me and I flinched involuntarily. From the corner of my eyes, I saw her hesitate to reach out to me and place her hand on my shoulder or arm. Instead, she brought her hand back to her lap and clasped the together tightly, pain evidently written on her face. Her pain only fueled my anger. Why did she have the right to feel bad when she was happy with Max, while I was being left to hang dry?! "Harry, what's wrong?" she whispered.

I turned towards her, eyes blazing. She flinched back in surprise at my anger. "You really have no idea, do you?" She shook her head. I stood up and started pacing. "How could you know? It's not like I ever told you! I mean I thought it was obvious in my advances how I felt about you," I rambled.

She stood up, gaining back her confidence and stopped my pacing with a single touch. I refused to look at her though, so she placed both her hands on either side of my face to make me look at her. Her eyes had turned to a light blue and they glistened with her own tears. "Harry, what feelings? I thought we were just friends and that there was nothing romantic between us. Max and I have been together since before I moved out here. I can't help it if I am tor... If I'm already with somebody else."

I jumped at her obvious slip up. "How come you never told me about him? Not even once was he mentioned to me. We were constantly texting or talking on the phone. How did you even have time to spend with him without me noticing?" I knew I had cornered her when her eyes turned blue with yellow outlining her pupils and her hands fell to her sides. Her mouth worked but no words came out. "Come on! Tell me! You wanted the truth from me! Now I want the truth from you, Dani!"

She took a step back and looked down at her feet. "I didn't want you to know about him," she whispered. Shock vibrated through my limbs. Did I hear her correctly or was I imagining things? When her eyes came up to connect with mine, they were a deep green and tears were rolling down her cheeks like little diamonds. I caught my breath not trusting my eyes or ears anymore. She took a step or so forward until she was standing so close, she had to look up at me. Her hand reached for mine and I was too shocked to protest as she held it in hers and gazed back up into my eyes. "I didn't want you to know about him because despite he and I being in a relationship... I was falling for you, Harry, and hard. I may have laughed at your attempts at sweet talking me and you flirting but inside I was crumbling like a warm cookie. That day in the woods, I hoped you would tell me if you had any real intentions for me. When you said nothing, I thought you just weren't ready yet. As days and days went by and still you continued to be silent. I thought I was falling for you but the longer you kept quiet, the less sure I was. I decided to just focus on Max because I was so unsure about you." She paused and I just stood there in utter shock. "You have no one to blame but yourself for this outcome, Harry."

I sucked in my breath and finally came to my senses. I brought my empty hand forward and placed it on the side of her face. "None of that matters now, Dani! Now that you know how I feel and I know how you feel, we can be together. We can move forward and explore what we might have." She was already shaking her head but I had a new-found hope now. It filled my frame and brought stars to my eyes. "Don't you see it? We can finally fix everything and be together."

"No, Harry, no we can't," she said shaking her head. I finally focused on her face to see more tears and pain. "It's too late. The school year is over and so is my time here as a study abroad student. I'm going back to California... and Max... Max is coming with me."

"No," I whispered in defeat and slumped my shoulders forward. I dropped my hand and I fought back the tears again. The hope that had just filled me with joy had disappeared in a matter of a few seconds.

"I was trying to tell you before you got angry and drove off earlier. I never wanted to hurt you," she whispered. If I had felt crushed before now I was shattered. I felt like the walls were slowly closing in and I had to hold back the tidal waves of raw emotion coming. Not only had I lost her but she would be out of reach for me to try and fix what I'd broken. I looked up to meet her gaze knowing the emotion I was feeling was evident in my eyes. She visibly swallowed and more tears fell from the puddles formed in her eyes. "I'm so sorry, Harry," she choked out. I just shook my head. I was completely deflated. "I wish I didn't see that much pain in your eyes. I wish I could fix it."

"Well, you can't," I replied quietly. She sobbed once and I flinched at the display of her pain. I reached forward caressing her cheek with my thumb. She leaned her head into my palm and closed her eyes letting more tears escape down her cheeks. I suddenly had a desire to do something before I never had the chance to do it ever again. I didn't know how she would react so I took a deep breath and went for it. I shifted my weight forward and guided her closer to me. Her eyes shot open when she felt herself being moved. I lowered my head down, the evidence of my intentions clear on my expression. She raised her head, giving in. I didn't know why she did but when my lips met hers, the lyrics coming out of my stereo said, "Kiss me, Like you wanna be loved... wanna be loved... wanna be loved, This feels like falling in love, falling in love, falling in love..."

The was everything I'd imagined and more. The only thing wrong was the situation and timing. I never forgot Dani or the way I felt about her. Even years down the road, I still looked back at that moment and cursed myself for my stupidity. There were so many things I would've done differently. I wondered if I would ever get a second chance to make things right... I highly doubted I would though...

(Just wanted to add a little note down here. There is another chapter coming, so no worries. But something ironic happened when I wrote the end part of this chapter were Ed Sheeran's lyrics from Kiss Me are typed. As I typed the lyrics, the song of Ed Sheeran's song was playing and it sang them as I wrote them. How poignant is that???)

Chapter Two: My Disappearing Act

I awoke with a smirk on my face. Today was going to be full of mischief. I was supposed to be going to the studio to record a bit more for another day in the past two weeks since I met Dani. But little did fans know and the boys that I wasn't going to show up. Only Paul knew where I was going to be. I told him because I didn't want him to worry when I didn't show up and when none of the fans would be able to find me. To sum it all up, after taking Dani back to her room that night we got to talking and we became really good friends pretty fast.

There was something about her I just couldn't shake. It had been almost two weeks since we first met on that rainy day. My life had been so monotone until she came along. We'd met up a few times over the weeks to chat and hang out. When I wasn't busy we would talk on the phone and when we couldn't talk on the phone we would text.

The times when we had hung out, I made sure it was with a group of friends. The reason for that was so paparazzi wouldn't say we were together and the 1D fans wouldn't send her hate. Also the friend status left us time to get to know each other. I didn't know how she felt about me but I knew how I felt about her. No matter how hard I tried I wanted to always be with her and every time I saw her face my heart would skip and I suddenly felt flustered. I stumbled over my words around her and my usual smooth outward appearance was lost on her. She laughed when I tried to sweet talk her or she would tease  me relentlessly. Even Nick would raise his eyebrows at how my attempts at wooing her flopped every time. Normally any other girl would be flattered by my charms but not Dani. She had such a carefree outlook on life that my charms didn't even phase her. I wracked my brain every night to try and figure out something. Finally I called her up one evening, because it was easier than being caught by photographers outside her apartment.

She answered with a, "Hello, Harry!" I took a deep breath and asked her if she would like to go on an adventure with me the next day. She eagerly agreed which surprised me. So, I made sure she knew it would just be her and I. I heard her laugh at me over the call and I couldn't help but chuckle when she replied, "I know, silly." So the date had been set. I was so relieved and then came the nerves.

I shook myself out of my stupor of thoughts and quickly got out of bed and got ready for the day. I took a little extra time grooming because I was so nervous. I didn't understand why thought, she was just a friend who I had stronger feelings for. I had been in this situation multiple times but never had I ever been this anxious. She did something to me I didn't understand. There was something about her disposition and personality that drew me in and her vigor for life was intoxicating. My only withdrawals were if she felt the same for me as I for her.

Once I was all ready to go, I almost lopped down to the parking lot. I was having Dani pick me up because my vehicle was too recognizable. I was going to drive once she got here thought because she didn't know where we were going. I had a picnic basket full of food and a blanket with my jumper draped over my arm. A smile slid onto my face as I felt excited for some one on one time with Dani.

I heard a car coming and I felt my heart leap when I saw Dani's car pull up and park. She got out a huge grin gracing her face and her eyes sparkling brightly as usual. When she got close, she happily gave me a huge hug and my stomach clenched nervously.I couldn't quite hug her with my arms full but I did the best I could. I took a deep breath taking in her intoxicating scent. She pulled back and said, "It's good to see you, Harry."

"Likewise," I smiled charmingly. She smiled and shook her head as she pressed the button on her keys to open the boot of the car. Once again I was left puzzled from her immunity to my charms. She sauntered over to it and I casually followed. I put the basket and other things in there then asked for the keys. Shaking her head, she tossed me them and got in the passenger side. I was  going to open her door for her but she got in so fast I was left standing idiotically. I finally got myself out of my shocked state and got in her car. I started the car and we pulled out of the parking lot and past the photographers without a single photo being taken. I relaxed after that knowing it would be easier now to be MIA for the rest of the day.

I drove for hours to get  where I wanted to take her and the longer it took the more curious she became. Secretly I enjoyed watching her squirm with impatience. So to prolong the torture, I was making the drive longer than it needed to be. She sat up straight suddenly and said, "Didn't we pass that sign fifteen minutes ago?"

I put an innocent look on my face and replied, "No, you're just seeing things."

She smacked me on the arm. "You liar! You've been driving us in circles for at least an hour because we've passed that sign at least three time!"

I chuckled while rubbing my now sore arm. Jeez, did she have an arm or what! "Okay, okay, you caught me red-handed. I'll go straight there now." Which was exactly what I did. I was taking her to a place near Cheshire I'd found while growing up. I'd never taken anyone there before. I had never even spoken about it to anyone. It had been my get away spot where I could sit and ponder without being bothered. It was a beautiful area on the outskirts of the village up hidden between the hills. I pulled onto a dirt road and Dani perked up. She'd been dozing off and on for the last several minutes. I could see the clearness of her ever-changing eyes go blue with anticipation. It was a clear day in England and I was grateful for the cheery weather.

I parked at the edge of the trees and shut off the engine. Dani was leaning forward in her seat transfixed on the sight before her. I chuckled and got out of the car to take the opportunity to open her door for her. I stood there waiting as she slowly got out. Her mouth was open wide still in awe. You would think she had never seen a forest before in her life. Once she was completely out, I grabbed her jumper off the seat because she left it. I shook my head chuckling as I shut her door and got the stuff out of the boot of the car.

She was still gawking when I came up behind her. I stepped to her side and placed my hand on her shoulder. She jumped so high and turned on me with such a look on her face that I thought she was going to attack me. "Oh... sorry. It's just really pretty. I was remembering something from my childhood."

I nodded in understanding. "Well, come on. We have a ways to walk." I handed her jumper to her and then slung the strap of the blanket over my shoulder and walked.


About twenty minutes later, we entered a clearing where wildflowers were growing everywhere., along the left edge a stream bubbled over rocks creating a trickling background sound. Trees grew a mile high and it felt as if you were insignificant in the world when you stood here and looked up. Birds chirped their cheery songs for the sun and squirrels jumped from tree branch to tree branch to check out the strange visitors there. Dani beamed. "Harry this is beautiful! How did you know this was here?" she inquired as she walked into the clearing and gazed up into the sky once she reached the center of the clearing.

I smiled. I was pleased that she loved the spot. My gut feeling had been right about bringing here first. I walked towards her and set down the picnic basket. I unrolled the blanket and she helped me spread it out on the grass. "I stumbled upon it when I was just a kid. No one knows that I know this place exists, not even my mum. I used to come here when I wanted to be alone and just think," I answered her as I settled on the blanket.

She was still beaming when she sat down next to me. Her eyes rested on me and I resisted the urge to tuck a lock of hair that had gotten loose from the part of her hair she'd pinned back. With sparkling eyes, she regarded me. I wanted desperately to know what she was thinking. Suddenly she put her hand on my leg and leaned forward. For a moment I panicked until she gave me a peck on the cheek and then I blushed the color of sunsets. 'Thank you for sharing your secret place with me, Harry. It's a very lovely thing for you to do," she said.

I was speechless. I didn't know what to say and she still had her hand on my leg. I gazed at her hand and she cleared her throat as she retracted it. I cleared my throat as well and said, "Your welcome." Then I laid back on the blanket to gaze up into the sky and ponder what I was feeling.

Chapter One: Rain, Rain, and Something Unexpected

I woke up with a start. My breathing heavy and beads of perspiration rolling down the sides of my forehead. I was clutching at my sheets in utter shock from the dream I'd just had. It was the worst nightmare I'd ever had and I didn't even remember any details except for the fact I was scared out of my mind. A nippy wind blew in from my opened window and I shivered in spite of myself. Sleeping commando was the most comfortable for me but it still had its downfalls at times. For instance, right now I wanted to go close the window but I was too cold to get out from under the covers.

I took in a deep breath and jumped out of my skin when my alarm clock began to blare! Fumbling with the buttons on my new clock and not being able to figure out how to turn it off, I unplugged it. "Blasted thing!" I muttered. I untangled my legs from the bed sheets and swung my legs over the edge of the bed. I shivered again, goose flesh rose all over my body and I reached for the robe hanging on the end post of my bed. As I stood up, I wrapped the robe around me and padded my way to close the window. I shut the window as a wind chillier than before blew and I gazed glumly at the black clouds in the sky. Thunder rumbled and lightning struck a ways off. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I turned from the window as the rain started to fall.

Running my fingers through my hair, I opened the door to my closet and stepped in to find something to wear. I grabbed a shirt, a jumper, a pair of jeans, boxers, and made my way to the bathroom. I stared at my tired expression as I turned on the faucet and then bent over to splash my face with cold water. I grabbed a hand towel and patted my face dry. Now awake a bit more, I quickly got dressed. I had a busy day today recording with the rest of my mates in the studio. Making the new album for all the fans was a blast and the response we got for the pre-order of the new single was absolutely mad! I smiled at my reflection as I reveled in the insanity of it all. Our fans were everything to us and we wanted to give back to them as much as we could.

I shook my hair and flipped it to the side once I was entirely groomed and ready to go. I put on my shoes and socks in my closet before I grabbed my jumper, keys, phone, and wallet. I opened the door and briskly walked to my car.


In a few minutes I was driving slowly through the crowds of fans outside the studio. Why they were all willing to stand out in the rain still made no sense to me. I was always afraid that I might accidently hit one of them as I would drove through. I waved to some and wasn't surprised by the camera flashes that followed. Finally I pulled through the gates and they closed behind me. I got out of my vehicle to be greeted with the shouting of my name from several girls outside the gates. I waved as I entered the building and heard several of the girls swoon. Once inside, I shook my head, the effect I had on some of the fans still didn't make any sense to me... I'm just Harry. I normal guy who loves normal things, normal people, and I enjoy many things. The only thing remotely special about me was that I was 1/5 of One Direction and the only reason we were so massive was because of our fans.

I shook my head, flipping my hair out of my eyes in the process. I gazed down at my phone in my hand and texted my mum back. She was always telling me good morning and to have a brilliant day and to keep smiling. I missed my family something fierce sometimes, especially my mum.

In a minute or so I was bombarded by Liam, Louis, and the rest of the crew telling me good morning. I replied and sat down, popping a grape in my mouth and settled down into the couch. Niall was currently in the booth singing his part of the song we were currently working on. Today would be slow moving but at least it wouldn't be a late night. I'd be out around 1300 and I had the need to just take a stroll through the park on the university grounds. I chatted casually with Louis, as Liam was currently on twitter. He was good with keeping up with twitters as was Niall. I often forgot about it. I tried to do better but I'd never been much of a person who was into the social media sites. I was more of personal contact person. I asked Louis what his plans were once he was done for the day. He smiled, "I was thinking about surprising El with a dinner and movie night at home. She's been stressing a bit about exams."

I nodded my head, "Sounds fun."

"What about you, Harry?" he reciprocated.

I shrugged, "I thought a stroll in the park with my headphones in would be enjoyable."

He nodded and then we all lapsed into silence as Niall came out of the booth. The mood was somber today, which was out of character for us. Maybe it had something to do with the weather and the song we were recording today. The song tended to send someone into a deep melancholic state. Once I filled my belly to where it was satisfied, I laid down on the couch, my head resting now by Niall and my eyes started to close. Liam was now in the booth, I dozed off to his voice crooning into the microphone.


I didn't know how much time had passed by when I was awoken by the boys roaring with laughter. "What?" I asked confused and slightly irritated from being awoken from my slumber. Niall was rolling on the floor, tears running down his cheeks from laughing so hard. Liam was laughing, Zayn was in the booth (he must've arrived after I'd fallen asleep), and Louis was holding his sides in laughter and pointing at me. "What?" I repeated. Then I realized my face felt a little funny. I brought my phone up and frowned. Someone had drawn a mustache and a uni-brow on me while I slept. I tried to scowl at my mates but I just couldn't and soon I was laughing as hard as them. It was incredible how fast the somber mood dissipated when we were all laughing so hard.

Tears rolled down my cheeks and they began to cramp from holding a smile for so long. Paul then walked in and I looked at him. He fought a smile when he saw my face, then he said, "It's your turn in the booth, Senior Styles!" That did him in and he cracked a grin and chuckled while everyone else roared with laughter and clutched at their sides as their abdomens became sore. I nodded fully conscious of the pen on my face and having no way to wash it off.


An hour later, I was out of the booth and had washed the ink off my face. Melancholy clouded my thoughts. The song always did that to me. It's lyrics really hit home. I sighed, rolling my shoulders and stretching after being in the booth for so long. Niall and I were done for the day, so we decided to grab a bite to eat and then go our separate ways. Before we got in our cars, we decided to take pictures with some fans and do autographs. The rain had stopped for the time being. We did as many as we could before our stomachs told us it was time to go eat. We said goodbye and I took a relieved breath as I entered the calm of my vehicle.


After lunch with Niall and taking some more pictures with fans, I drove to the park on the university grounds. Once parked I pulled out my iPod and plugged in my headphones. Locking up my car, I put in my headphones and started to take to the path. There was a small drizzle, so I zipped up my jumper and pulled up the hood. I walked taking in all the sites and the wonderful smell filling my nostrils. I sighed in contentment. It smelled of earth and decaying bark and leaves. I came to a bench overlooking a pond and stared as each raindrop hit the body of water. I shivered once in my jumper and smiled.

I continued on the path, passing by other students. I was suddenly grateful for the rain and the need to wear a hood and keep my head down. I was less likely to be recognized. For a split second I thought, I could've been studying here at this university. I wonder how different my life would be... My brain glided along on that thought line for a moment when suddenly I was smacked into from behind and belly flopped right into the mud! I coughed trying to catch my breath after having it knocked out of me. Someone was knocked out on my back and I was suddenly gripped by momentary panic. Pulling myself back to my sense, I pushed myself up slowly so the body on top of me rolled off gently. I turned on my side and jumped at what I saw. A girl with blonde hair and fair skin was unconscious next to me. I sat up and crawled over to her. I felt for a pulse and sighed when I found one. She began to groan and I waited for her to open her eyes.

The rain had stopped when her eyes opened and I was greeted by the startling blue of her eyes. Her eyes showed major confusion for a moment and turned a slight green in the process until they widened and grayed with horror when she registered I was covered in mud and so was she. "I am so sorry!" she blurted. "Sometimes when I go for a jog int he rain I slip and black out..."

I thought it odd that one would slip and black out but I wasn't shocked into silence because of that. I was in shock because not only was she beautiful but she was clearly American. Her accent was like smooth butter and I had to force myself to answer. "Oh no, it's quite alright. It can get quite slippery on the path during a storm. Do you need help getting back to your quarters?" Quarters?! Did I just say quarters! What the?! Of all the idiotic and ancient things to say, I say quarters?! Ugh! I thought.

She laughed and I couldn't help but smile and forget my earlier shame. Her laugh and smile were infectious, even with her being covered in mud. "I would like that. My name is Dani by the way, Dani Sams," she replied.

I put my hand out and helped her up after I had stood. She was still a bit wobbly, so I held tight to her until she got her footing and balance back. She was standing in front of me and our eyes met. Her eyes expectantly waiting for an answer to her question. "Oh," I blushed. "Harry..."

She smiled, her eyes softening to a blue-gray and the edges folding at the edges and a dimple showing up in one of her cheeks. "Do you have a last name, Harry?"

"Yes..." I said unsure if I wanted her to know. Her eyebrows rose when she noticed my hesitation. I swallowed and said, "Yeah, it's Styles. My name is Harry Styles."

Her eyes widened in recognition and I cringed inwardly waiting for her to fangirl. The mud all over my face had kept her from recognizing me until I had given her my name. I watched as her surprise faded and her grin widened, "Well, it's nice to meet you Harry Styles. Mind taking me back to my 'quarters' now?" She winked and I immediately relaxed. Her reaction wasn't what I had expected and I was silently grateful for her cool exterior.

"Of course," I smiled. I offered my arm to her and she graciously took it. I knew she was a bit wobbly still, so I thought my arm would help steady her. Chills ran up my spine from her touch and also from being chilled to the bones from being covered in mud.

Chapter Seventeen: Taking Chances...

I was still sitting on my bed staring at my phone with tears streaming down my cheeks and confusion rumbling around in my head, when someone knocked on my door. I quickly wiped the tears off my cheeks and shoved my phone in my pocket while rushing to make myself look like I'd been packing the entire time. "El?" Came Harry's inquire.

"In here! I'm just trying to finish up packing for Paris. I don't want to miss anything," I replied. I heard the door open and I wasn't surprised about the butterflies and heat rushing to my face just hearing him say my name. I really did love Harry and I wanted to spend every moment with him! But now there was this tugging on my heart for Neal. It just didn't make sense and it was really unfair to Harry. I didn't know what to think or what to do. No wait I take that back, I did know what to do and it was to save all this turmoil for later. So I filed away what I was feeling for Neal until I could examine it more closely on my own time. I was holding up a shirt when Harry wrapped his arms around my waist, kissed my neck, then rested his chin on my shoulder. I sighed. He was so endearing and sweet, I loved him so much! I leaned back in his embrace dropping the shirt I was holding, I turned in his arms so I could look at him. When our eyes met electricity was imminent. I felt my heart skip a beat and I knew he was my forever man but what about.... I shook my thoughts subconsciously. I had never felt this with Neal. He'd always been kind but the electricity, the fiery passion had never been present with Neal.

I placed one of my hands on Harry's cheek and was about to go on my tip-toes to kiss him, when he asked, "Are you okay? You look like you've been crying..." His hand came up from around my waist to trace the tracks my tears had left on my cheek. His eyebrows knitted together with concern.

I turned my head and kissed his palm and then said, "I was on the phone with Neal. It upset me more than I thought it would telling him about us. I didn't realize until today that he had feelings for me. He's one of my best friends Harry. Hearing the pain in his voice hurt me a lot more than I thought it would." The tears started to fall again down my cheeks. His eyebrows still knitting together from his concern. He pressed his lips gently against my forehead and I wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his chest crying my eyes out. He held me for as long as I needed him to while the tears fell. I thought I had exhausted myself from all the crying, but I still had more in me.

"El, love, did you care for him?" Harry asked hesitantly as he continued to stroke my hair comforting.

I pulled away to look him in the eyes. "He's my best friend, Harry, of course I care for him. He was there for me when I felt alone and he showed me love and concern. He was my knight in shining armor." My eyes averted from Harry's to stare at the front of his shirt.

I saw it rise and fall as he took in a deep breath. "He'll get over it, El. If he cares for your friendship and loves you, he will come back to you," he comforted.

"You really think so?" I asked hopefully gazing into Harry's green eyes. He smiled endearingly and I felt my heart swell with love for him. I knew his answer without him having to speak. We'd gotten to that stage in our relationship where we could just look at each other and I knew what he wanted to say. It was amazing and I loved him so much. Standing there with Harry there was not a doubt in my mind that I wanted to be with him forever or for ever how long we were meant to be together. He was everything I wanted and I felt the fullness of my life and the happiness I felt with him. The only nagging doubt in the back of my mind was that of Neal. I knew there was something unresolved there and I had to get rid of that nagging doubt somehow. I just didn't know how yet.

I looked up into Harry's eyes once more and he smiled down at me. "Can I make a confession?" he asked.
I nodded, my stomach suddenly erupting with butterflies as my sensed recognized the seriousness of what he was about to say. He smiled but I could sense his nerves as his arms wrapped around me tightened their grip. His eyes glistened with love and it made it difficult to hold his gaze. "I love you so much, El. I want you to be happy whether it is with me or someone else. While I want to be selfish and keep you here with me forever I know that might not be possible. You have college starting in about a month and a half. Separation will be hard and different. Do you think we can last through it?" I could tell he'd given a lot of thought into this and I wanted to give him an honest answer.

"I don't know Harry. I want with all my heart and soul to say yes, we can make it but I honestly don't know. You have a tour starting, so we wouldn't be able to see each other much anyways. I want us to last just as long as you do." I ran my hand over his head, brushing the curls for a moment off his forehead. He smiled lovingly and I returned the look. "We will figure it out. I know we will because we love each other. We just have to take a leap of faith and hopefully by taking chances and making sacrifices we will make it."

He smiled down at me and bent his head forward as he pressed his lips against mine. I slowly ran my hands up his chest to wrap them around his neck as the kiss deepened. I sighed behind his lips and grinned. He pulled away slightly to where our lips were just barely touching and he whispered, "How did I get so lucky?"

I giggled and replied, "I'm the lucky one."

"On the contrary, I am the lucky one. You are everything I never thought to even ask for and yet I still have you," he whispered as he pressed his lips against mine again. I held him close savoring each placement of his hands on my back and waist, and each gentle brush of his lips against mine. I was on cloud nine and had been for the last month. I still couldn't believe my luck and the fact that we were each madly in love with the other was something I thought I would ever get to experience with anyone. I loved Harry with all my heart and soul. A thought of Neal tugged in the back of my mind but I thought, Neal is my friend. Harry is my lover. There is a difference of love I have for each of them. It's Harry. It has always been Harry. I sighed once more and then grinned. Harry grinned as well as he placed another kiss on my lips.

Chapter Sixteen: Blast from the Past

I remembered sitting on my bed trying to remember what more I needed to pack. I knew we were going to be coming back to the house after Paris but I had to make sure I had everything. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I pulled it out to find I had a text from someone. I opened up the text and smiled when I saw it was from Neal. It read: "Hey El! How are you? Sorry I haven't called in a while! I hope you're having loads of fun and I can't wait to hear from you!"

I felt a warmth encompass me. It had taken a while for Neal and I to become friends. Mostly because I just fought him tooth and nail. I thought he was too nice and to be honest hitting me in the face with a door and then calling me Ellouise was not the way to get on my good side. I remember the day after that Neal had asked our French teacher if he could switch his seat so he would be sitting next to me. I glared at him hardcore that day. I didn't like Neal all that much back then. Slowly he wormed his way into my heart and he'd become one of my best friends there.

I think our defining moment would've had to be when I had been sitting alone at lunch. I'd been sitting in a corner booth all by myself. I swear I repulsed people because no one sat even near me. Doesn't inspire much confidence in yourself when it seems like no one wants to be around you. Neal and his huge group of friends sat on one of the big tables not to far from where I sat. Many days at lunch I would catch him staring at me. I would also look away with my heart beginning to ache because of the pity I saw in his eyes. Sometimes it made me angry. Although that day, I remember sitting there eating my lunch when someone sat down in front of me. I jumped startled that someone would even want to sit next to me but when I saw who it was, I was even more surprised. It was Neal and he was smiling at me. I rose my brows quizzically and he chuckled. Then I asked, "What are you doing?"

"I'm eating. What does it look like?" he replied.

"No I mean what are you doing sitting with me? Your friends are staring and so is everyone else. No one sits by me, I'm the freak," I whispered still staring at him.

He swiveled in his seat looking at everyone. When his eyes met someone's they would quickly look away and go back to what they were doing. Finally his eyes came back to me and he said, "I want to eat with you. No one should eat all alone and like I said a while back, I want to be your friend. If you'll let me, Ella." He didn't say anything else as if that settled everything. I continued to stare at him throughout lunch. I couldn't believe him. Why was he committing this status quo suicide? He was like captain of the football team and everyone loved him. I'd learned more about him throughout the past month or so. It just didn't make any sense. I was the freak and he was the jock even though I was a jock too but no one treated me like one. I was an outsider on almost every level... It didn't make sense. When he would catch me staring incredulously at him still, he would just smile.

When lunch was over, he walked me to my class. Slowly he got me to talk and answer his questions about myself. I came to find we had much in common and I started to warm up to him over the weeks. He had such a sweet disposition and I swear every time I found myself in an awkward position, he would rush in to save me. I used to tease him in the beginning of our friendship that he was my "Knight in Shining Armor". He used to just laugh and shrug it off. I remember the time he first saw my room. It was during Homecoming I remember it very well.

Neal had been slowly worming his way into my life and heart for about a month when Homecoming week was suddenly upon us. I had no plans on going to any of the special activities the school had planned for the week. Except for the things meant specifically for Seniors. I remember Monday night chilling in my room, listening to my tunes, when someone knocked on my bedroom door. "Come in," I called out. I was laying on my bed upside down. So my feet were up on my wall tapping out the beat to Stand Up by the boys and my head was by the foot board of my bed. I had my eyes closed and when I heard the door open and shut then silence. I turned to look to see who entered and when my eyes met Neal's I sat up so quick that I knocked over my lamp on the table next to my bed. He just stared at me and the posters of the boys all over my walls. His mouth slightly open from shock. "What are you doing here?" I snapped.

His eyes shot back to mine and he blushed brightly. "I... um... Your mom said you were in your room and I could come down to get you for the school thing tonight for Homecoming Week," he replied.

"Oh...." then it became silent and extremely awkward. I put my lamp back up and just sat awkwardly on my bed. Neal continued to stand by my door looking around at all my posters. "Uh... Neal. What are we even doing tonight?" I asked trying to get him to stop looking at my posters of One Direction. I wasn't ashamed, I loved them so much but this was my personal space and Neal had just intruded. I was feeling very unbalanced.

His shocking blue eyes snapped back to my sea-blue ones. I had to keep myself from catching my breath. I'd forgotten how amazingly gorgeous Neal was. You could definitely tell the Greek in him from the way his dark brown hair curled like some Greek Hero and his strong jawline only more defined from the dark stubble on it. His skin was dark, darker than mine. He was muscular in all the right places and the definition showed in the t-shirt he wore. I consciously tucked a lock of my curls behind my ear as he registered what I'd asked him and I kept from blushing at the sight of him. "We have the movie on the lawn tonight. I thought you might want to be my... um...would like to join me. I already have a spot set up at the school. I brought a couch and some blankets. Would you like to?" Neal asked.

I felt my heart flutter... Did Neal want to ask me on a date but knew I wouldn't exactly be okay with that just   yet? I snapped out of my reminiscing and began to pace my room. My thoughts were going a million miles a minute.

I couldn't remember if that's what he meant or not looking back on it but thinking about that night brought the butterflies back. I immediately was confused by the present feelings I was feeling reminiscing about mine and Neal's relationship. I was head-over-heels for Harry! What was going on?! That night at the movie on the lawn was amazing. Neal had put his arm around me and I'd allowed it. I never let Neal get too far. I always kept him at an arm's length away. I never understood why until now. I was obsessed with something to happen with one of the guys from One Direction and now I was here in the same house with them and falling head over heels for one but reliving memories of my best guy friend in the world. I finally understood how much pain I'd put Neal through. He'd fallen for me and I'd pushed him away because of a fantasy I never even knew would actually come true.

Now that it had, I felt like I'd cheated Neal out of something special... What kind of friend was I?! It hurt to think of how sweet, endearing, and patient Neal had been throughout our Senior year. He was my friend, there for me through the entire year and I had been selfish. I gazed down at his text and it just proved how selfless Neal was towards me. I wondered if he knew about Harry and I yet. I almost didn't know if I could tell him the truth now that it had finally clicked that Neal had feelings for me. Everything started to come together, the puzzle was becoming whole. Tears formed in my eyes. How could I have been so selfish?! I didn't know what to think, but I had to ask Neal if he knew about Harry and I. So I dialed his number. He answered the phone with, "Hello, El, I've missed you."

I sighed a complete calm blanketing my previous worries. Just hearing his voice made me feel relaxed. I'd missed my best friend. "Hey Neal. How are you enjoying Greece?"

"It's very pretty here, El! I wish you could see it!" he replied and just hearing the joy in his voice lifted my spirits.

I smiled, "I've seen and experienced some spectacular sites as well. Neal..."

"What is it El?" Neal asked immediately knowing something was up.

I took in a deep breath... "Have you been keeping up with the tabloids?"

"No," he answered simply.

I sighed and said, "Well, there's something I need to tell you." I could here his silence and it was letting me know to continue. I stopped pacing and plopped down on my bed, suddenly exhausted. "Well a lot has happened since we last talked, like a lot a lot, Neal. For instance, Becca and Zayn are now a couple and so is Anne and Niall... And... Harry and I are together as well. I couldn't believe it myself when he was making moves and being so suave. He was working his charms the first day we were here to be honest. I finally let him in and I think I might be in love with him, Neal." Silence met my last sentence and it was intense. I could feel his pain through the phone connection and my heart began to break. I couldn't believe I was doing this to him but he had to know. Especially now since I knew how he felt about me. I loved him with all my heart and I hated hurting him but I was in love with Harry. I heard a sniff and for a shocking moment I realized Neal was crying. Hearing that sent me over the edge and the tears started to roll down my cheeks. "Neal?" I asked unsure.

I heard him take in a deep breath. "I'm so happy for you, El! So happy! You deserve all the happiness in the world! I hope he treats you well," he said. I knew it was forced happiness. It was written all over the tone of his voice. The tears started to fall faster now. I couldn't believe I was doing this to him.

"Neal, I am so happy! He's so kind and sweet! Everything I dreamed he would be and more! I really do love him and he loves me! You deserve just as much happiness as I do. I bet you've met some hot Greek girl and are head over heels for her." My happiness wasn't forced even though tears were streaming down my cheeks and my heart was aching for Neal.

He chuckled half-heartedly, "Yeah, that's what's been happening. Are you going to come see me, El? I miss you."

I took in a shaky breath. "I will talk with everyone. We are going to Paris for the next two and a half weeks and then I don't know what all the boys have planned...."

"Oh," he answered.

"I will try though. I promise! Neal..."

"Yeah?"

"You know I love you right? You're the best friend a girl could have asked for, especially someone like me. You let me in and accepted me when no one else would. You're one in a million pal and I love you," I said trying my best to cheer him up.

"I love you too, El." he replied in a somber tone. I had failed in cheering him up but at least I had tried. I heard someone calling on the other end in a language I didn't know. Neal answered back in the same language. It clicked that he'd been speaking Greek to someone. "I have to go now, El. I hope you continue to have fun. Bye."

He hung up before I could say goodbye back. I stared at my phone in my hands as tears continued to fall. For the first time in my life, I felt my heart torn between two people. For some reason that phone call had made things difficult now. Neal was my best friend and I loved him... Harry was my dream guy and I loved him with a fiery passion but which one was more realistic and which one would last longer? I didn't know the answer to that question and to find the answer I knew I would have to shatter my heart and someone else's in the process. I just didn't know anymore... Not know... I began to wonder if I ever did...

Chapter Fifteen: One Month Gone and France Here We Come!

It was amazing how fast time flied when one was having fun! Harry and I had become very close. It was no secret we were head-over-heels for each other. Whenever we could have a second alone, we took it. Anne and Niall were the same way and so was Becca and Zayn. With the extreme pairing off going on, Danielle and Eleanor had joined us, so now Liam and Louis weren't feeling awkward.

The boys had taken us all over the UK.  We'd seen some spectacular sites. We'd visited some magnificent castles in Ireland and Scotland. The guys took us to places even they hadn't seen before. That way we were experiencing things for the first time together. Everything we saw was breathtaking. My favorite moment would have to be when Harry took me to Jurassic Beach. It was so romantic! Harry had planned a special picnic for us and we spent the entire day there just the two of us and we spent the entire day there just the two of us. Our relationship really grew stronger that day.

The worst part was when I finally persuaded myself to go on twitter. It wasn't exactly as terrible as I thought but just getting myself to do it was hard. Harry sat next to me while I went on to twitter. Throughout the month I'd tweeted a bit here and there. Also through instagram Harry and I had posted pictures of us together. I remember the pic I took of the ocean on our romantic day. It was an amazing shot. I mostly tweeted about how much fun I was having but I never looked at my timeline or my mentions. I remember it was the day after our picnic, I tweeted, "Harry surprised me today! We went to Jurassic Beach! The whole day was romantic! #IThinkImFallingInLove" The hashtag wasn't exactly the truth. I already knew I was in love, Harry and I just hadn't announced it to his entire fanbase yet... I was kind of nervous...

A couple days after the day Harry took me to Jurassic Beach, he convinced me to look at my twitter mentions. Taking a deep breath I went to my mentions. As you know, Harry was next to me, he held my hand in silent support. Taking another breath, I began to read. The first fifty or so were super sweet. I was glad to know people were happy for us. Someone even said they could tell how happy I made Harry and that they were happy for us. I replied to that person with, "No, he makes me happy! I'm the lucky one!" He smiled at that. I was majorly surprised by how many followers I'd gained and how many people wanted me to follow them. All just because it was rumored that I was Harry Styles' new flame.

My heart sank though at the first awful mention. I could feel my eyes tear up and then I remembered that they didn't know me. They were lashing out at me because of anger and jealousy. Someone told me I didn't deserve Harry and that I should go to Hell. Harry's eyebrows rose when I pointed that one out to him. I told him not to worry and I decided to wittily reply back to that certain person. I wrote, "You're right! I don't deserve him! ;) Maybe you should let him know!" When he read what I was going to send, he laughed.

Once we went through most of them, we couldn't get through all of them... There were SO many! Harry looked at me with this expression on his face that I couldn't quite place as to what it meant. "What?" I asked.

"You're amazing, you know that? You handled the awful and great mentions like a pro. You were even witty to the mean ones. I think I'm in love with you," he replied with a blush and a smile.

I laughed and gazed seriously into his eyes,"The feeling is mutual, Mr. Styles. Plus some people lash out to hurt people because they feel like they need to. I would be lying though if I didn't admit that some didn't hurt my feelings. I just have to stay positive and remember that they don't really know me."

He smiled and leaned forward to kiss me. I wasn't lying when I said I was falling for him, only now i could say I'd fallen and I'd fallen hard. He backed away to pull out his phone and I watched him tweet. It said, "I'm so happy! I never imagined my summer would turn out this way! Thank you, Ella! I love you! xx ;D" I almost went to stop him from posting it. He turned his gaze on me and said, "I will only post the truth and it won't be taken lightly. It's time to do this. The fans deserve to know how serious we are about each other." I nodded, he was right and he sent it to be posted. Then he tweeted something else without showing it to me and my phone buzzed twice. I still had their tweets being sent to my phone. I looked at the second message which was Harry's second tweet. I t said, "I want to thank all the people who give El lovely comments! xx Love you guys! :)"

I did the same thing on mine, thanking those for their sweet comments. I then replied to Harry's first tweet. I said, "Thank you, Mr. Styles! ;) xx I feel the same way about this fabulous summer! Wonder what else comes! ;) I love you too! xx" Mention, retweets, and favoriting went crazy between those two tweet of Harry and I telling each other we love one another. Harry and I chuckled it was cute the support we were getting from millions of fans. It almost made this relationship easier, which was difficult because it was such a smooth ride from the beginning. We just fit each other perfectly. Harry yawned and since we'd been sitting on my bed, he laid down. Motioning for me to join him, I closed my laptop and laid my head on his arm. We cuddled in quiet solitude. Our eyes gazing into the other's, he smoothed my hair back tucking it behind my ear. He rested his hand on my cheek tracking my cheek bone with his thumb. His eyes were blurry and his eyelids began to droop. I knew how tired he was. We had been out late the past couple of nights, partying because he wanted me to meet his friends. I still didn't know where the other guys had taken their girls over the past few days. We kind of went separate ways for a few days so relationships could grow and we kind of wanted to be unnoticeable. It was extremely hard to do when we all went places as a large group.

I felt Harry's hand go still and his breathing deepen. I smiled lovingly at his sleeping face and brushed some of his hair off his face. I then moved forward, snuggling into his chest. His arms enveloped me as I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. His scent had become familiar to me now and I immediately relaxed. Soon I was asleep as well, taking an afternoon nap with the man I loved.


I awoke to my cell phone blaring. "Hello?" I answered groggily.

"Hey, where are you and Harry?" Anne's voice came from my phone.

"Hm... We fell asleep up in my room after going through my mentions on twitter," I replied.

She took in a sharp breath, "Oh! How did that go?"

"Not that bad actually. What did ya need?"

"Oh right, the boys have an announcement. They're going to tell us where we're going to spend the next two and a half weeks. Wake up Harry and come downstairs to the front room." She said and hung up without me answering.

Harry groaned and stretched. "Who was that?" he asked.

"Anne. We're needed in the front room,"I replied. He smiled with his eyes still closed and I gave him a quick peck on the lips.

Harry smiled and opened his eyes. "Is that all I get?" he asked innocently.

"Yup," I said as I went to hop off the bed.

"Oh no you don't," Harry chuckled as he grabbed me around the waist and pulled me back down to the bed. He then proceeded to tickle me. I protested loudly trying to get him to stop. "Not until I get a real kiss," he laughed.

"AHH!! Okay fine!! Fine!!! You win!!"I squealed out of breath. Immediately he stopped and placed his hands on either side of my head on the bed. Slowly, his eyes sparkling with victory, he lowered himself until he was inches away from my face. He raised his eyebrows several times, challenging me. I laughed and grabbed his face to bring him down far enough so I could kiss him. The kiss became quite heated and when we parted we were both out of breath. We just stayed there staring at each other, marveling at how strong our feelings for each other were. I broke the silent intensity first, "We need to go downstairs."

He cleared his throat as he nodded then rolled off of me and the bed. We exited the room, fixing our hair and clothes so it didn't appear obvious that we'd been making out or as the British would call it... Snogging. ;) As we walked down the stairs Harry found my hand out of habit. I reveled in the thought of that and it gave me butterflies. We were the last couple in the room and everyone's eyes were on us. Anne asked, "What took you guys so long?"

I shuffled my feet awkwardly after we sat down on a love seat. Niall all of a sudden just laughed and said, "You guys were snogging weren't you?" We both blushed bright red. "I knew it!" Niall exclaimed.

"Moving along..." Harry said before anyone else could comment. "We have an announcement don't we?" All the guys nodded and Harry continued, "We have something very special planned for the next two and a half weeks..." he paused for dramatic effect. "We're going to Paris! For two and a half weeks we're going to go around to all the tourist attractions in Paris or at least as many as we can."

All of us girls were ecstatic even Danielle and Eleanor. We'd all become extremely close over the past month. We spent the rest of the day excitedly chatting and then packing. All because tomorrow we were going to be on our way to France.

I remember while packing and thinking about Neal and wondering how he was enjoying Greece. I hadn't had a call from him since the last time... I hoped he was doing alright...